Have Patience with Yourself

2020 the year we were truly introduced to patience. We were told that we could not leave our houses, no contact with our friends or family, working from home, and wait for it…..?!?

Queued for toilet paper which was flying off the shelves, all because people could not think of more creative ways to wipe their own arses. Impatience is something that we have developed over the years as the internet grew, so did the need for an instant response. This has led many of us to become impatient with many areas of our lives.

We want everything now, we have lost the ability to learn how Gratitude for where we are at this exact moment is helping us to achieve the most in life. We are in a better place in terms of what we have access to, including the opportunities which present themselves. Our ancestors did not have the same access to what we have now, however, what they did possess was the ability to remain patient and have a deep faith that it did not matter how long it took, they were going to achieve the desires they were seeking.

This week has been immense in terms of having patience with where I see myself heading in life, especially in relation to my goals. I am going, to be honest, I just about made the deadline that I have with my cousin each week. This was due to my lacking the normal motivation which I have. It took me five days to finally feel myself again, and start writing this blog. Could I explain how I felt? No - however, it was through having the correct level of patience to know that how I was feeling, was not going to stop me from achieving a goal I have set for myself weekly.

In the end, this week has turned out to be really productive in ways I could not have imagined. So yes having patience as you feel the motions is imperative in understanding that the world was not built in a day, and you’re allowed to have days in which you don’t quite feel like doing or achieving anything much (you are human after all).

Personally, by being impatient I have ended up in places that could have easily been avoided if I had paid more attention to the journey as opposed to the final outcome. The journey is actually the most beautiful part, watching something unfold in a manner that you didn't even expect as you allowed it to happen naturally as opposed to always looking for it to happen. By constantly searching for what we want, the chances are it will take longer for it to manifest, and along the way, you could end up manifesting all of the stuff that you did not want. Then that just creates a different problem. However after many conversations with others, I have identified that some achieve by focusing on the final outcome and that is how they achieve much in their lives (and they have achieved well).

I have found that I am a person that needs to follow a process in order for anything to make sense for me. ( my human design is that of a Generator- I will include a link below so you research your human design - it may help you to understand how you operate in this world) I like to take my time and enjoy the journey along the way, and in this sense, I am able to feel a great sense of satisfaction as I work towards a goal that I have in place.

Now I am not going to act as though patience has always been a strong point, there have been many areas of life that I have had to learn to be patience within so that I am able to achieve the outcome that I want in the long run. This added to the fact that usually once I have achieved what I want especially within my career, I get bored, and then start looking for the next best thing to keep my mind growing.

We all have things that we want to achieve, and at times we want to achieve things in the fastest way possible. However, along the journey we need to take the time to really get to know ourselves, and what we want for ourselves. The journey to some places may need to be healed. I have personally been on a healing journey for the past six years and there have been many areas that I have had to heal within my life. The first place that I started within was my childhood (as mentioned in a previous blog) that was a difficult place but also the place that has helped to shape me as the person I am today. The patience that was required (and still is required at times) was immense.

At the beginning of this journey, I just wanted to be healed as instantly as I possibly could. I remember having a conversation with my cousin and stating I only take five weeks to heal. He literally laughed at me and replied “healing is a process, you cannot put a time on how long it will take you to heal” I did not want to hear him, but in reality, it was the truth. So now I had to learn patience with myself. Not rush just flow.

So along the journey to healing patience is what became a major factor for me. I began to understand that each time I believed I was healed something would come up, that would demonstrate that I was still in healing mode. Eventually, I gave in, there was no way that a process of healing could be rushed and therefore I needed to learn the patience of myself on this journey just like I had developed patience within other areas of my life.

Patience is about loving yourself, it is understanding who you are. Standing in the power of your own heart. Knowing that everything will always be alright even if you cannot see it at a particular time. Everything that happens within life is about divine timing. We can not have anything before the time that we are due to have it, and if we are impatient in wanting something to happen before our time it will take longer for what we want to come into alignment.

So how do we become patient with ourselves? One of the things that we could do is just review that in some cases life is a process that needs to be followed. There are many steps which follow a process and it will depend on what you are trying to achieve as to what the process is that you may need to follow.

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“Take the time to get to know you a little better. Be patient with You”

I have found that patience not only allows you to understand yourself that little bit better but it also enables you to see those around you with clear vision. You will start to notice things about people that you may not have noticed before. You begin to hear how another’s mind works, and this gives you the opportunity to not look at the other person more closely, but to look at yourself closely and see if this is in alignment with where you see yourself going. Rushing does not allow you this opportunity, as when we rush we are not seeing others clearly. It is patience that enlightens our vision.

Rushing to achieve balance within yourself will lead to feeling anxious. We can not force ourselves to become the best version of ourselves. The best version of ourselves is something that we are creating every day. We have different thoughts each day when you rise, some of these thoughts will be positive and other thoughts will be more challenging. Allow the thoughts of who you see yourself to becoming, to be the overall goal - and don’t get upset on bad days.

Try not to compare your journey towards discovering yourself, with the journey of another. Most people are able to disguise who they are, and if you are basing your journey on the journey of what another is demonstrating you may believe that you are behind another or not at their same level. You are at the level in life which you are meant to be. You are learning about yourself, in a way that is suitable for you.

“Judging others is not part of the process”

Part of patience is also not judging another while they are on a journey towards discovering themselves. There are going to be areas of another that will need time to heal, and if you are trying to force them to heal themselves, what does this say about you? We should try to be what we see another to be. If they are part of your life they are there for a reason. Maybe there is something that you need to heal together, as opposed to healing separately. No matter what anyone says there is no such person as a fully healed person (yep - not even me!), there are those who understand the importance of healing themselves so the least you could do is be patient with them along the way. This will come with rewards for you and the other person.

Have a love for yourself and all that you come into contact with during the time in which you are getting to know yourself. You should not feel forced to love yourself, not should you feel forced to love another. There is a strength in being able to love you, during this process. This does not mean that you are not there for others, but just remember that true love liberates as opposed to hindering you. Be patient in loving you. Be patient in loving another.

Care for yourself during this time, take the time to go on a walk or find yourself a special place. I have a beautiful park which I go to each and every summer (and winter if I feel the calling) it is a place that I have introduced to a selected few, and each time I have also explained that this is the place in which I have been able to discover myself. This special place has been part of my journey, I can remember how it felt when I first started attending my special place, and how I feel now when I go to my special place. This is where I understood that patience was a key part of getting to know me.

When you enter new situations, you will become a different version of self. It is not a bad thing, people do change when they come together, this is more about finding a balance within the situation. It is about really looking at who you are in relation to another person. We all have things that we may bring to another, although we may not be able to see it at the time.

You should always see yourself as enough if you have been in a place in which you have experienced situations in which you may have been treated as though you are not enough. This is nothing to do with the other person and more to do with how you see yourself. Again this is something that takes time, retraining you to see you as enough is not a process which happens overnight, but something that you can work towards over a period of time.

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Part of developing the self is learning to forget about how you once saw yourself to be, and who you are now becoming. I found this challenging especially as I was once more concerned about how another saw me, as opposed to how I saw myself. You will be able to do it, you will be able to see yourself as much more than you once believed. Because you are even thinking about this journey, that is a clear sign and indication that you are ready to experience a different layer of you.

Be truthful with yourself, and try not to feel disheartened when you are having a bad day towards building this new version of self. I have had days when I have questioned who I see myself to be. I have had moments in which I have just wanted to revert back to my old self as that is what I once remembered to be comfortable. To stay on track with these feelings, I only have to remember what it felt like when I was in the place in which I was not my happiest version of myself and that is usually enough for me to continue forward.

Rest is also important when developing a new version of yourself, as mentioned before you are not going to change overnight as this is a process, and part of this process is learning when you have to step back and just relax. You may feel like sleeping all day, or binge-watching Netflix’s - whatever it is that makes you feel comfortable when you process this new version of yourself do that. But more importantly, do not feel guilty for resting, your body knows when it has had enough and it will shut down in whatever way possible to do what it needs to do… rest.

Have a person who you feel comfortable enough to talk to while developing yourself. Someone in which you can be open and honest with how you are feeling. We have a tendency to not talk when we are not feeling ourselves, and sometimes that is all we need to do, talk. Talk about what you are feeling impatience towards, just do not dwell on why you are not quite feeling yourself. Remember feeling is energy, and energy is liable to change at any given time.

Having patience with self is one of the most mind-opening experiences you will have, once you realise that you are the most important person on this journey. Yes, there will always be others in your life that will be important to you, but if you are not firm with yourself first, you may lose yourself in relation to who you are now developing to be.

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Song of the Week

Ordinary People - John Legend

We're just ordinary people

We don't know which way to go

'Cause we're ordinary people

Maybe we should take it slow

Take it slow, ohh

This time we'll take it slow

Take it slow, ohh

This time we'll take it slow

Keep pushing with being you, keep striving to understand who you see yourself to be, understand that the journey is a process that can not be rushed or forced, and that along the way you are going to have days in which you question who you see yourself to be. This is all okay as long as you remember to have patience with the newly emerging you.

Love, Light and Blessings, NSJ XXXXX

Further reading

https://www.humandesign.net/basic-concepts.html Define your human design

https://www.jovianarchive.com/get_your_chart Your Human Design chart

Images

Available @ https://twitter.com/quoteiloveu/status/931508479558160386 accessed on 18/06/2020 @ 18.38pm

Available @ https://www.instinctualwellbeing.com/the-three-types-of-patience/ accessed on 18/06/2020 @ 18.39pm

Available@ https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/22729173091874631/ accessed on 18/06/2020 @ 18.40pm